As annoying as they are, glasses have been a thing in my life since I was 18 months old. An eye condition known as strabismus (AKA lazy eye) runs in my mom’s side of the family and my generation happened to be the generation it didn’t skip. Because of this, when I was little I was always going to the ophthalmologist to get my eyes checked. Thankfully, being the second born of my family, they were ready for my eye problems and it was caught early, stopping my vision from getting as bad as it could’ve been.
Even though it isn’t as bad as it could’ve been, it’s still affected a lot of my life. In elementary school, I was always that one kid that asked to be seated close to the front of the classroom because I’m nearsighted and farsighted. On the playground, I was always scared of breaking them or scratching a lens because the scratches always happen to be right in front of your eyeball making it impossible to see.
When I was doing gymnastics, wearing glasses was an absolute nightmare. I swear I almost broke my glasses every single time I did anything. I fall into the foam pit- I land on my glasses, I do a cartwheel- my glasses fly off. Those things had to have been made out of Minecraft bedrock because I somehow did not break a pair doing gymnastics.
I had always been self-conscious of my vision, afraid of people making fun of me for my eye turning inwards when I take off my glasses, my non-existent peripheral vision, or how I look when I take off my glasses. It never occurred to me that it didn’t matter. It was always a dream of mine to be able to see clearly without glasses, to be able to walk in the rain with my head held high and be able to see because it seemed as though everyone else had no glasses. Everyone else was perfect. They weren’t like me and it tore me apart. I hated my glasses with a burning passion so I pretended at points to not need glasses. I’d strain my eyes to see a somewhat clear picture without my glasses until my head hurt so bad I couldn’t think straight. But, eventually, I couldn’t do that anymore. No matter how hard I tried to deny that I needed glasses, I needed them.
Now, as I realize my passion for musical theater, my vision problem makes it difficult to do what others find easy. Since I have basically no peripheral vision, it’s hard for me to stay in line during dance numbers and to see the things around me. But that doesn’t stop me from trying to dance or do theater. Yes, it gets me down at times, but it never makes me give up.
I believe that this life-time long experience of overcoming the difficulties my glasses and eye condition have given me shows that I am a determined person and a problem solver. My strabismus has knocked me down many times, but each and every time I’ve gotten back up. Now, as I’m soon turning 17, I’ve finally come to peace with the fact that I have glasses and I’ve got a lazy eye that doesn’t like to work properly and have learned to accept this as a part of who I am. Of course, it would have been nice to be born without this condition, but what can I do? I didn’t get to choose my genes.
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Hey Cassie, as a person who's also had glasses from a young age, I understand a lot of your experiences. Although not as young as you, I got my glasses when I was 7. I did have noticeable vision and had to sit in the front often as well. I've always played a lot of sports, and unlike yours, unfortunately my glasses always broke somehow. My glasses still to this day get some scratches on the lens or fly off. People who do any sort of sport or physical activity with glasses knows, and if we take them off then we can't see what we're doing! Although glasses can be a struggle, and having poor eyesight in general being a struggle, at our age we've come to accept it and see through it.
ReplyDeleteHi cassie, your blogged changed my perspective on glasses, i never knew what it felt like having it your whole life. I only knew what it felt having them for a short period of time until someone stole it (i still need those glasses) also the allusion you made on minecraft spiced the blog up
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